There’s a quiet power in a woman who’s been broken and still chooses to rise. If you’ve been through heartbreak, divorce, or betrayal, you know the kind of pain that brings you to your knees. I’ve been there too.
I know what it’s like to feel lost, to wake up with a heavy heart, and to wonder if you’ll ever feel whole again. But I also know that healing doesn’t come all at once; it comes in baby steps. It’s not about having it all together. It’s about showing up for yourself, one tiny decision at a time.
In this post, I’m sharing 10 habits that helped me rebuild from rock bottom, habits I still lean on today. They’re simple, powerful, and completely doable. And if I could rise, so can you.
1. They Feel Their Feelings Without Shame
Women who rise from rock bottom don’t skip the hard parts. They feel their feelings fully, honestly, and without apologizing for it. They know that healing doesn’t come by pretending they’re fine or brushing the pain under the rug.
They cry when they need to. They write it all out in a journal when their mind feels heavy. They pray through the pain, even when the words are messy or broken. And sometimes, they just rest because they understand that emotional healing can be exhausting.
They don’t label their emotions as too much or not spiritual enough. They understand that grief, anger, sadness, and confusion are part of being human.
You don’t have to fix everything today. You just have to stop hiding from how you really feel. Let the tears come. Let the silence speak. Let yourself be real because healing doesn’t start with pretending you’re okay. It starts with being brave enough to say, I may not be okay right now, but I will be fine.
2. They Set Sacred Boundaries
At some point, a woman who’s rising decides that her peace is non-negotiable. She stops explaining herself to people who are committed to misunderstanding her. She no longer bends over backwards to be liked, accepted, or approved. That version of her, drained, resentful, and stretched too thin, no longer serves her healing.
Instead, she starts setting boundaries, not out of bitterness, but out of deep self-respect. She says no without guilt. She doesn’t answer every call, attend every event, or engage in conversations that leave her feeling heavy. She protects her time, her heart, and her energy like a queen guards her crown because she finally knows what she’s worth.
And here’s the truth: boundaries aren’t about pushing people away. They’re about choosing you. They’re about creating space for peace to grow and for safe, healthy relationships to thrive.
If that makes you feel selfish, let me remind you: self-care isn’t selfish, it’s survival, and the sacred boundaries you put in place are the foundation.
Read More: How to set boundaries when you have always been the giver
3. They Redefine Their Worth
One of the most powerful things a woman can do after heartbreak is reclaim her identity. Not who they said she was. Not who she became in survival mode. But who she truly is at her core.
Women who rise stop tying their worth to who left, what failed, or how messy things got. They no longer believe the lie that they are unlovable, too much, or not enough. Those stories might’ve echoed in their minds for a while, but eventually, they chose to rewrite them.
And where do they begin? With truth. They open their Bibles, they return to prayer, they lean into the voice of God over the noise of pain. And in that sacred space, they start to rediscover who they’ve always been: chosen, seen, loved, and whole, right in the middle of the mess.
It’s not always easy, but I can assure you it is transformational. Because when a woman remembers her worth, she stops begging for scraps and starts building a life that reflects the royalty she carries.
Read More: How to reclaim your identity after a breakup or divorce
4. They Choose Wholeness Over Revenge
There comes a moment in every healing journey when you realize that holding onto bitterness is costing you far more than the betrayal itself ever did.
Women who rise stop waiting for the apology that may never come. They stop replaying the betrayal or hoping karma will take care of it. Instead, they choose something far more powerful: wholeness.
And no, it doesn’t mean what happened was okay; it doesn’t mean they forget. It means they refuse to let the pain keep poisoning their peace.
Forgiveness becomes a choice, not because the other person deserves it, but because they deserve to be free. It’s no longer about who was right or wrong. It’s about who’s ready to heal and move forward.
When a woman chooses peace over payback, she begins to rise in ways the world can’t understand. She walks lighter, she sleeps better, she smiles without faking it. Because peace? It’s the sweetest kind of revenge.
5. They Build a Daily Ritual of Renewal
Healing isn’t just about one big breakthrough. It’s about the small, quiet things you choose to do every day to come back to yourself.
Women who rise don’t wait for the perfect moment to feel better; they create it. Through gentle, soul-resetting rituals, they carve out space to breathe, to listen, and to realign.
Perhaps it’s morning prayer before the world wakes up, a slow walk in silence, or a journal filled with honest prayers and affirmations. Maybe it’s lighting a candle, sipping coffee in peace, or playing worship music while getting ready. These aren’t fancy routines. They’re little things that remind you that you still matter.
They don’t rush the process, but keep showing up for themselves, one small, faithful act at a time. Because healing, for them, is no longer just a phase. It’s a way of living. And the more consistent they are, the more powerful the transformation becomes.
Read More: 5 Daily habits to start rebuilding your confidence.
6. They Speak Life Over Themselves
One of the most significant shifts in a woman’s healing journey occurs when she changes the way she speaks to herself.
No more name-calling, no more shame spirals, no more internal bullying telling you lies about how you should have known better or will never be enough.
Instead, she starts speaking life. She replaces lies with truth. God’s truth. Not just occasionally, but every single day. She looks in the mirror and says, “Even though I am still healing, I’m still worthy.” She catches herself mid-criticism and chooses kindness instead. She stops rehearsing her mistakes and starts declaring her progress.
She doesn’t always feel confident, but she speaks as if she’s becoming the woman she prays to be. Because she knows her words shape her world. And speaking life over herself is how she builds a new one.
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7. They Learn From Rock Bottom, Not Live There
Rock bottom can feel like the end, but for the women who rise, it becomes the beginning.
They don’t pretend it didn’t happen or sugarcoat the pain, and they also don’t set up camp in the rubble. They look around, gather what they’ve learned, and carry that wisdom into the next chapter.
Every mistake, every tear, every moment of regret becomes a teacher, not a tattoo. It may have left a mark, but it doesn’t get to write her whole story.
These women reflect without reliving. They ask, What did this teach me? What do I now know about myself, my strength, my God? And then, they take one brave step forward.
Because while her past may have shaped her, it never had the power to define her.
8. They Surround Themselves With Safe People
One of the hardest but most healing lessons a woman learns after heartbreak is that not everyone deserves access to her heart.
Women who rise become intentional about who gets close. They no longer tolerate draining friendships, manipulative advice, or performative support. They don’t waste time explaining themselves to people who make them feel small.
Instead, they seek out safety. They lean into sisterhood, mentorship, and community; places where they can breathe, be seen, and be held without judgment. They open up to those who honor their healing, rather than rushing it. They say yes to the kind of connections that feel like home, not pressure.
Healing is sacred work. And these women no longer try to do it all alone. They link arms with others who are also rising, and they grow stronger together.
9. They Dream Again (Even If They’re Scared)
When your heart has been broken, it can feel safer to stop dreaming, to stay small, to not get your hopes up, just in case life lets you down again.
But women who rise learn how to hope again, slowly, softly, courageously.
They don’t force it, nor do they need to have it all figured out. Instead, they start small, with a quiet journal entry or a vision board that whispers what could be, or a list of prayers that once felt too bold to say out loud.
Little by little, they let light back in. They stop apologizing for wanting more joy, peace, and purpose. And they stop letting fear make all the decisions, because they understand that even if they’re scared right now, they’re still allowed to dream.
10. They Let God Lead the Way
When everything falls apart, it’s easy to cling to control, to try to fix, figure out, or force your way forward. But the women who truly rise? They do something different; they let go and let God lead.
Through tear-soaked prayers, surrender, and shaky trust, they invite Him into the mess. Not just the polished parts, but into the real, raw, messy places. And little by little, healing becomes their norm.
They stop needing all the answers and start following God’s peace. They make space for His timing, His wisdom, and His comfort even when it doesn’t make sense, even when the path ahead is foggy.
And somehow, in the letting go… they rise. Because she now walks by faith and not by sight, and that changes everything.
Final Take Home,
You don’t have to do all 10 habits perfectly. Just start with one. Healing isn’t a race, it’s a sacred journey, and you’re already on your way. Even if you still feel broken, even if it’s hard to see progress, trust this: every small step you take toward wholeness matters.
You are not behind. You are not alone. And you are absolutely capable of rising stronger, softer, and more radiant than ever before. Keep going, beautiful. God’s not finished with you yet.
With Love,
Dr Janet
